Tuesday, March 13, 2012
Today is one of those days where I am seriously discouraged. Elizabeth needed to resume her Strattera, or we would never have made any progress in home school. Also it appears she is following in my footsteps with her jaw.
Yesterday evening she began complaining that her ear ached. So this morning I took her to the doctor, I was worried she had an ear infection again. Happily it was not an ear infection, it is however a sign that she may end up being like me. I suffer from TMJ, I grind my teeth but I also have an incorrect bite. It's been somewhat corrected when I was a teen and wore braces, but single parents don't always have a ton of money to spend, so half way through my treatment we ran out of money and I had to stop. So I have been struggling with this issue for years now. For a long time the only way to correct my bite permanently and fully was surgery. With todays advances in medicine, I don't know if that is still true, but sooner rather than later, I'm going to need to get into the orthodontist and get it taken care of for the sake of my jaw.
For me, my TMJ flares up a lot when I sing too much. I don't chew gum or chewy foods, I am careful about what I eat, because I have thrown my jaw out of alignment before and it was not pleasant. When my TMJ flares up I can be down for days, because like migraine sufferers I become light and sound sensitive, everything hurts me and it is not fun.
When I graduated high school I knew I had TMJ, but I had hopes for becoming a professional recording Christian performer. After one semester of being a music major I had to switch majors, and my TMJ flaring up was one of the biggest reasons. So while this is not great that Elizabeth will face this struggle, I don't see her wanting to grow up to be a singer. She doesn't sing constantly like Beka and music doesn't come easily for Elizabeth; Beka is more like me when it comes to music, it just flows out of her.
I think the reason this new discovery bothers me extensively is because as a parent you want what is best for your children. You want them to grow up to be happy and healthy and there is always a part of you that wants to protect them. Protecting Elizabeth is a tougher job than protecting Beka. Beka is right on track developmentally and even a little ahead. Elizabeth struggles to learn in school, she works harder than Sarah or Beka when it comes to education or learning some of the simple social skills. So it stinks that this is one more thing she has to face, one more challenge to overcome.
Thankfully, Chris is doing well at Boeing and things are moving upward for him. This means raises in pay, possible promotions, it means better resources to help Elizabeth as she fights to survive in our world. People tell me God can heal Elizabeth, and I believe God can heal anyone, but I also believe it isn't always in his plan to heal those who ask for it. I have no doubt that he can heal Lizzie, but just because he can doesn't mean he will. And up to this point in time he has not sent a healing touch to her yet. So for now we keep medication going, we work with doctors, specialists and therapists on an as needed basis.
I hope you all have a good week.