I am getting ready for school. Most of us are parents getting our children ready for school, but this year in addition to adding a three year old who will become a peer-model for children with disabilities at Little Early Childhood (her first real school experience), or a teenager enter the 10th grade, or my eight year old who starts the third grade this year, I am getting myself ready to resume school.
I started as a freshman in August 1992 and while the general course for those who usually start college is finish in four maybe five years, by the time I walk and receive my diploma in May 2011, it will in fact, have taken me 19 years to complete college. . .
Why so long? Why would I take so many breaks? What on Earth happened that required me to take so long to finish? All good questions and the simple answer is Life happened. The complicated answer, the things that stood in my way were first a breakdown, second a family car accident that took the life of my grandmother and left my brother a hollow shell of the young man he used to be; a year spent as a volunteer missionary in Catania, Sicily, and finally, I got married and had a family. Ironically enough, it was the car accident that made me cry "Uncle", not the fact that the year prior our house had caught fire and destroyed almost everything. I still pushed on, but no, that pesky car accident threw a huge monkey wrench into my college ambitions (funny how mourning and sittting by your comatose brother's bedside tends to do that).
I would never ever take back the year I spent working in Catania, I had a great year and learned a lot about another culture and that language is not always a barrier. Nor would I ever give up the fact that I married a wonderful man and we started a family early out. I even resumed school in 2007 after Beka was born (insane, maybe, but it helped me out tremendously), but after finishing the year took the time off to help the girls while Chris was deployed. I know me, I know what I could have done, and some people could have attended college and juggled all of those things. I am sadly not one of those people. I could be a great mom or I could be a college student, while Chris was deployed but I couldn't do both. I have learned that lesson the hard way.
So now I prepare to go back to college and I will be done, soon, very soon. And as I look at this, I must confess I am a little worried. I am worried that I will have a hard time finding what I want to do with my degree (right now I'm leaning towards Industrial Psychology - they help businesses and their employees, etc . . .). I worry I won't be able to find a good job to help support our family while Chris goes back to school if his business idea doesn't do well. I worry that in fact, I am 36 years old and I have no clue what I want to be when I grow up. It's a little scary, to say the least and yet, I have to move forward. I need to finish to set a good example for my girls and show them the importance of finishing college. So I push forward and try to embrace the unknown. We'll see how this goes.
I hope you all have a good week.